Recently, I came across an article on the Nairobian magazine . The headline read, “A millionaire ex-priest loses wife to best friend”. The story was abominable and got me thinking, there is something very wrong with the marriage system. Of late, there has been so much negative publicity on marriages. If it’s not cheating scandals (which has become normalized because ‘all men cheat’ right), it’s either a spouse ran away with wealth or even worse, one ended up butchering the other. Tob Cohen’s murder is one that has taken me aback and I can’t stop asking myself, “what demon drives people to the extent of committing such unspeakable, heinous acts?” This ex-priest was even lucky his life was spared. He was just left broke, bruised from a couple of arrests ordered by the wife and maybe a broken heart, soul and ego but at least he has a chance to start all over again, but murder? There is no coming back from that.
When the year began, a week wouldn’t go by without a case of a husband hacking the wife to death. Is it that people have the wrong idea of marriage? Or people are marrying all for the wrong reasons? Or is it something we are not doing right during the courtship period? We probably need intersession from our forefathers. For a generation that is aspiring to marry or get married in a few years time, the thought of marriage is becoming a by the way. Not a priority in life anymore. They’d rather focus on their lives and careers. Besides, nobody wants to create a nightmare out of their lives, as marriage life is being purported to be (But it’s good to know that not all marriages end in shambles, some turn out to be great!)
Nowadays it’s very normal to come across a 40-year-old bachelor. Or even a 40-year-old single woman. Never been married or had kids before. Well if you find this appalling, you need to snap out of it and look around you, it’s here, it’s actually happening. It’s hard for our parents to accept because once you hit your late twenties, they start nagging and raising questions.”Utamleta lini?”, “Nataka mjukuu”. This reminds me. Recently when I went to visit my grandpa, all my elder cousins were summoned to a serious meeting to discuss marriage. Haha… apparently they are delaying. Story for another day. But it is what it is. Times are changing and they have to accept it.
Statistically, it has been said that women who are not married tend to be happier than their married counterparts. I don’t know how true this is, but statistics often don’t lie. Some even go to the extent of saying that, the single ones tend to live longer due to a stress free life. I won’t dwell much on that.
All in all, this marriage industry seems to be crumbling. One can only pray by God’s grace to get a good partner or else, you are either walking into a nightmare or a death sentence. Despite the vows reading “for better or for worse”, when things get to its worst, the marriage can no longer stand. And when the Grim Reaper takes too long to execute “till death do us part” the spouse takes on the role of the Grim Reaper instead.